“Not too late, but never too early,” my father often says of me and my time-keeping skills. Not to mention my gift giving, considering his Christmas present arrived on December 25th (Thank Jesus for Amazon Prime).
Which is actually giving me too much credit (as parents do). Because, in reality, I’m always late. For everything. Just ask anyone who’s known me for twenty minutes. They’ll tell you they would have known me for half an hour if I’d just turned up on time.
And this holiday greeting is, sadly, no exception.
But I like to think of this less as a “flaw” and more of a “side effect of eternal optimism.” I mean, don’t you wish everyone trusted the world the way I unquestionably believe I’ll be on time because this time I can shower, get dressed and do my make-up in under ten minutes?
Surely, we can never have too much optimism. Especially during the holidays, when New Year’s Resolutions are just around the corner and we’re all promising to exercise more, eat less Chinese takeaway and stop updating our Facebook when drunk in 2014.
Take, for example, this video: I optimistically thought we would be spending Christmas in Australia with our friends Travis and Emily, which is why I started recording this holiday message on their sunny back porch in Brisbane.
But it turned out even that was going too far. That’s right. Recording a Christmas message on December 23rd with the presumption we would still be in the same country on December 25th was too optimistic.
Which is why this is our Holiday Greeting:
But look on the bright side: You’re not getting this on Valentine’s Day. So, though I may be late, just remember I’m not that late. Which, frankly, makes me an inspiration.
Come June, when you’ve not lost the ten pounds you promised to shed for bikini season and, instead, you’ve put on five, you can think to yourself, “I didn’t put on that much weight.” Followed by “Tasha wasn’t that late with her Christmas message.”
And when you’ve drunkenly posted on Facebook that you played hookie from work, and then remembered in the morning that you and your boss are Facebook friends, you can think, “It’s not that bad. At least I didn’t call her an asshole.”
So there. You see? I did it for you guys. Because everyone can use a little optimism and a bank of good excuses…or what I prefer to call “a positive outlook.” Call it a gift. You’re welcome.
Oh and Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
P.S. – Ryan is in the background saying he would totally have had this out on time if this were his blog. But I’ve just reminded him how selfish that would have been of him. Christmas is about being the pillar of imperfection that your friends can look to to feel better about themselves. That is true selflessness. And the meaning of Christmas.